Sunday, January 31, 2021

Letters

I participate in a photo challenge project of facebook.
Each day is a new topic and you can interpret in any way you choose.
Today the challenge was LETTERS
Hmmmmmm
I could put stamps of all the letters I have,
I could put one of my hand made cards I make,
I could add a hand written letter received or sent by me.
Then I remembered......
The letter I found in my Mom's things in my attic.
It was one of my typical days, went into the attic
to get one thing, saw a box with Momma's name on it,
began going through it right there in my attic.
Perhaps a touch of Adult ADD?
Whatever it was, I found this letter in that box...


So today I knew this was the letter I wanted
to use not only for my photo challenge but for my blog entry.
I read the letter again after I post it and
I am once again, touched by the writings of my dear Dad
to his family. In today's World, we think of all the changes
in this year, with the unrest of our Nation, Corona virus,
masks, etc. It scares some, makes others angry,
others have come back to Jesus....
In my Daddy's words I can see him trying to reassure his family
that he is capable of going where he cannot tell them he is going.
Yet, I read the fear in his words as well,
a young man, maybe 21 knowing he is going overseas, to war.
Once again I realize, as different as this year has been to so many of us,
every decade/time have had their fears, things to question
the times. Yes, this year has been so very hard
for so many, yet in words written in the 40's the fear of 
their times comes through.
Not long ago, I read a book about the yellow fever epidemic.
I cannot find this book to save me life right now as I wanted
to read it again to compare it to this Covid year.
But I remember reading how frightened everyone was as people
began dying in mass numbers. How some doctors believed in
their treatments and used them until that said Doctor, 
died having used his own treatments.
Covid had not hit here yet when I read this book but
I remembered thinking how scary that must have been,
whole families passing away while quarantined to their own homes.
Never believing that we would almost be living through
something so similar less than a year later.
So yeah, all these thoughts came from a one word
photo challenge: LETTERS
It is why writing and blogging has to be part of my life.
Can you imagine the things that go through this mind of mine???
Happy Day my friends!


 

Saturday, January 30, 2021

ONE DAY, TWO BIG HAPPENINGS

 What to do when one day gives you two wonderful milestones....
You blog about both of course!
FIRST:
My Godson, Rick Gisclair, who I blogged about a few days
ago reached a goal in his Navy career.
He was made Chief Petty Officer in a beautiful ceremony.

Rick and his beautiful wife, Sarah

Another from Rick's big day
This young man, at the age of 33 not only
has made the Navy his career but made goals
for himself and continues to surpass all even he 
may have believed would come true.
This Chief Petty Officer is a big deal and
although I had the link to watch his pinning ceremony
I could not get signed in. Thankfully his very proud Mom and
Dad not only watched it but taped it.
Another testament to not just Rick and his hard work but
to his Mom, Ali, as well. 
Rick always wanted to be married, to have a good woman
by his side. When Ali and I met Sarah for the first time
as we visited Rick at Virginia Beach we knew that would be
his wife and what a great wife she is!
So proud and love you two sooo much!
Congrats!

2nd Big Happening:
(permission given by Frankie)
To all of our surprises, after talk being that Big Frank
would need inpt. rehab to get his lungs and strength up,
I got a text about 4pm from Kd
"Come visit! We are at Momma's and Daddy is home!"
Did not take me long to get my paints closed and shoes on.
As I drove there, I told myself, "don't cry, say something funny
to break the ice, don't cry, don't cry...."
I saw Kd, Rod and the grand girls as well as a few more
cars were there. I walked in to say to Frank,
"What some people will do for attention"
Broke the ice so "I would not cry"
The Guilbeau's usually gather most Friday nights at
Cathy and Franks. I used to hang out with them on 
Fridays but it had been a while since I had broken
my visiting tradition. It is a thing I plan on reintroducing to my life.
I have never seen Frank so frail but he looked so healthy,
talked a lot and didn't get short of breath, 
I believe getting him home with home health is the best medicine
for him. To have all those girls he loves so much surrounding him.
We spoke of illness, our dreams, how very lucky we are.
Filled him in on things that were happening while he was so sick
and Cathy, finding out for the first time just how sick he was and
just how close she was to loosing him.
I did cry.... on my way home. 
I seem to do a lot of crying lately but it was happy tears.
More than one doctor has said Frank is a miracle,
only 10 percent ever make it off the vent and if they do
not many do so having not had any long term effects from it.
Don't tell me miracles do not exist.
WE have all been changed because of Frank's journey.
It was a great day!

Friday, January 29, 2021

A GRANDGIRL REUNION!

I followed up with my Primary Care doctor yesterday
and although still have a touch of pneumonia, I have been
clearance to start getting out there again.
I learned something new yesterday, well a few things,
If you have a hospital stay you have to quarantine 23 days
from the day you were diagnosed. I was diagnosed Jan4th
soooo I am free to start getting out this house.
Yet, Covid don't really care what the doctor says,
I had so many things I wanted to do yesterday but after
my doc. appt. at 11:30 I could not wait to get home and take a nap.
This is going to take longer than I thought.
I set my alarm for 3pm because not only did Rod make a gumbo,
something I had been craving while I was sick,
but I was finally going to get to see my Grand girls.
I have not touched these children or been close to them since before
2021 started. 
I left my house and as I turned into their street I saw a bus in the
back of the street. I timed it so that I would be stopped right in front of 
their house when the bus put them down at their home.
Perfect timing. First Jemma never looked my way, 
saw her Daddy frying fish in his shop for their snack
(yeah fried fish for a snack, lucky girls)
I honked lightly and JoJo saw me and started jumping and
dancing and then Jilly saw my car. 
Her look of confusion told me she was trying to figure out
how I got there, then she is also surprised, 
I finally get to turn in and my three little grandgirls
are in my arms once more. 
I cannot tell you just how good it felt to hold these girls 
in my arms again. They had so much to say, so much to show me,
I did not want to scare them by breaking down and crying.
That part was hard, lol.
OH my sweet girls, they have grown so much.
Jemma singing songs about how she loves her Mumsie.
Jolee telling me about her secret prayer that made me 
and Poppy better.
Jilly and I just catching up on all that has happened.
By 5 pm I was ready to go home as they had homework,
baths, etc.
I left such a happy Mumsie and although I don't believe
i have ever taken my relationships with these girls for
granted, I know they had become even more special to me
now. I am thankful for all the memories we have left to be made.



 

Thursday, January 28, 2021

God and Glory...

This blog has been on my mind for a few weeks now.
It is hard to discuss politics and religion for me.
I have my beliefs and they are ever changing.
Because I own the blog I am able to pretty much
say what is on my mind but I never want anyone to think
I know better than anyone else, that I know more than most.
The fact is, I am a simple girl from a little Louisiana town
who was brought up in the belief of God, who went to 
my neighborhood Catholic church and always loved it.
I raised my children in the same church until we moved to 
Thibodaux. After my divorce, my praying and deep thoughts
never changed but  aside from going to church with the grandgirls
at school, I pretty much stopped going regular.
I love the history of the Mass and I love churches.
My beliefs are not strictly Catholic and I am a firm believer
that there are many roads to Heaven and God loves all
of us whether we pray, don't pray, believe don't believe, he is there.
When Frank began to get better against all odds, we were
told by more than one doctor and nurse, that we had
been witness to a miracle. 
It is that concept that just will not leave me.
How blessed we are.
I want to share a thought I have and again, it is my thought,
I don't know if it is right or wrong but it is mine and it is
what I know.
I was speaking to a friend a few days ago, about how good I was
feeling, how much I have amped up my praying since I 
have been home. She is a beautiful Christian woman always
doing whatever she can to help others.
She made a comment that day,
"I just keep asking God, why don't you just fix this? I
know He can he has the power and yet the pandemic continues,
the hatred surrounding politics...."
I share with her my belief..
I too believe God could fix this pandemic if he thought
that was best, he could give our Country peace but
I also believe that God gave us a mind and the free will to use it.
So many are not turning to God, so many are not trying to find
peace but want to argue their beliefs as being truth.
I share with my friend, I believe God is giving us
a wake up call, showing us what a mess we can make if left
to our own accord. God fixing our issues will not fix the mind
and hearts of us who have all we need to fix things ourselves.
I believe God allows these things to happen so that we can
hopefully open our hearts and eyes to the pain of our World.
He made us so perfect, in his image with the heart and mind
to think. The pandemic has taken us out of a lot of places we once
felt free to enjoy whenever we wanted, one being Church.
How I pray for the day when I can again go to St. John and
sit with my grandgirls at their school church and pray with their
school and classmates.
My final thought, however is this. Church is not just a beautiful building.
As taught as a child and believe in it even more,
"Where two or more or gathered in His hame, there is Church"
We are Church. When I have a conversation with my dear neighbor
about God, we are at Church. 
All our Big Man asks is that we believe, we speak of him,
we pray. Our World will go back to a more normal one
but I pray daily that we never forget the fear of hopelessness
that brought so many of us back to Our God.
It is all He wants. This life is temporary and although
i am no way ready to leave this part of my life yet,
I know an eternal life with God is there for all of us
just for the taking.


Tuesday, January 26, 2021

ITS A NEW DAY, IT'S A NEW DAWN.... and I am feeling fine

 Another rainy, beautiful day that I am happy to say,
I woke up to. Yes, every day I wake up it is with a new
energy and mind set to know I am getting better and I am
once again transformed.
Yesterday and today my goal was to make some phone calls,
nothing like some good talking to get those lungs working again.
(diarrhea of the mouth has not been cured, sorry)
I spoke to a few friends, Mrs. Shirley, my dear life saver
of a neighbor, Phylis, and this morning my boo and a dear 
friend Robby. My breath remains short and raspy at times
but my mind, its got a lot to say. lol
Today, I want to focus on yesterday.
I have not driven in over a month, didn't even know
if my car would start, but every day I set
myself a goal, an action, something I have to obtain and 
I go for it. Yesterday was to go to the bank and maybe even
the grocery store. Through my illness, I had my dear
neighbor, and my wonderful hustler and sister wife picking
up things for me and after discharge I was using Rouse's delivery
system, which by the way, was a wonderful thing and I
would encourage anyone who needs grocery help to use it.
Anyway, to be so nervous to sit behind the steering wheel 
of a car was something I had not experienced since I was sixteen.
I felt like that little teenager who just got a license and was
told to go somewhere ALONE. In a moving vehicle.
I think i just sat in my driveway for 20 mins. contemplating
whether I could do it or not. My first stop,
the drive up at the bank. Now y'all know i have to talk to everyone.
The teller, whether interested or not had to hear of 
my first outing in over a month. She seemed to be interested,
but maybe she is just getting good at it. lol
Yet, as i left I told her "I appreciate you"
It's my new mantra. Everyone will know I appreciate them specifically.
I know it makes a difference, I see it in their eyes
as their mouth is covered by masks.
Okay, made the bank, got that done, should I push it,
yeah, Rouse's small store, not crowded, I can do this.
I get my mask on, get a basket to hold on to in case I need it,
and I walk in and my favorite cashier is right there at the first
register, greeting me like the friends we are.
"Where you been??" 
I tell her of my illness and she is praising God for my recovery
and I am smiling behind my mask as well.
I decide I am going to use this as my walk and go down every aisle,
just to look.... I get to the cucumbers, and I stand holding
my basket. I am not weak, I am not hurting, I am not short of breath.
I am overcome with emotion. I am crying. 
Crying right there near the cucumbers where anyone could see
because I am alive and I will be okay and I am at the
freaking grocery store. I have got to get myself together and I do.
the next aisle, the Daddy of the grandgirls best friends.
He is so very happy to see me, we talk about how much 
he and his little girls and family have prayed for
"Mumsie" and "Poppie" as all the grandgirls friends call us.
He speaks of his little girls lighting candles for us all at church
and I didn't cry but I felt it welling it up.
To have been prayed for, have been thought of so much
just gets you under the belt sometimes.
Yes, I did my groceries, checked out with my favorite cashier
and as I left looked her right in the eye and once again repeated
"I appreciate you"
Don't let one day go by without a chance to let another
know you need them. It is a hard world right now.
Love to all.

Monday, January 25, 2021

DREAMS VS HALLUCINATION

I have spent many a days of my life in hospitals.
Whether it was a childhood cancer patient,
a healthcare worker, a sitter, taking care of my parents, etc.
So it is easy to be said, I have no fear of hospitals or the
things that happen in those facilities. There is one thing I do know,
you do not sleep lots in a hospital and I am okay with that.
You are there for their expertise, for what they can do to get you
well. One thing that did change for me with this hospital stay
was the all encompassing HALLUCINATORY DREAM.
It has continued to stay as vivid and as haunting to me as the morning
I had it and this blog is to get over it as well as talking of one of
my newest and dearest friends, Jerri.
Because I am now an artist, painting home portraits of people's 
prized homes, I have made sooo many new friends.
Some are seasoned friends, close as I paint for them,
and we move on, others, put their name down as soon as I complete
another and others just become life long friends.
My dear Jerri is a new life long friend.
When we first met through a big order we texted lots,
learned so much of the other, did life learning and then
came the day that she made the trek to Plaquemine to get her paintings
and have coffee with me.
If we ever thought we would not remain friends before then, after
that meeting we KNEW it was forever!
She was one of my text life lines as I fought Covid.
So it is fitting, although unusual that in this hallucinatory dream
she was the one who came to me, she was my savior.
So let me set up the scenario.

(jerri and I)
I had been in hospital for three days and nights
and was having lots of trouble sleeping/ getting comfortable,
just not good days or nights even though I was getting 
better daily. My night nurse, who I now
remember her beautiful name, AMBERLIE
 came in and agreed I had to get in some
sleep so she took care of my fever, set me up an iv of phenergan
and hoped I could get a little sleep.
It must have been about 430am when i finally fell asleep....
but i would not call it a fitful sleep. It was short lived
but seemed like hours.
I would have bet I was awake.
I sit up from sleep
 and I am in my cottage, I am in my own bedroom
with the beautiful new comforter Boo got me for Christmas.
I sit up and I am terrified as to not knowing how long I
had been asleep and my cats were in my bed, knawing
at each wrist and a snapper turtle attached to another part of
my arm. I can only explain the cats as being like they
had died and come back from Stephen King's Pet Cemetery.
They were fighting for food, so hungry that I guess
I became their main course. As I am trying to get these cats off
myself Jesi walks in excitedly, "Mom you made it, your alive"
I, not knowing what is going on am fussing her.
"Why did you let your turtle in my bed,Why have you not
fed my cats? Jesi get them off, they eating me alive!"
Then she explains that I have had Covid pneumonia and
I went to sleep but then they had a hurricane and a flood and
Mom, we could not get to you! She is crying and so happy
and yet I have cats and a turtle still hanging on to my arms.
mind you, I had Iv's in both arms so I am sure that had something
to do with it feeling like something was biting me.
I look outside my bedroom window to sunshine but debris everywhere,
water everywhere, starving animals everywhere.
Jesi leaves to go find food to get the cats and turtle off my arm
and there in the very very far distance I see someone walking 
tiredly but fast to my Cottage,
Who in the world could that be? There is no car that can pass
she is on foot holding plastic dollar store flowers in all colors
in her hands. "Lilly! Oh my Lilly!"
As she gets closer it is my dear, special friend, Jeri LeClaire!
"I have been trying to get to you, you were not answering my texts,
I didn't know if you had made it, I know I come every month
to stay with you but I just could not get here. I just walked
5 miles but I am here my friend I will take care of you!"
And she does.....
She puts her plastic dollar store flowers right in the flower bed
by my window. As she has gotten closer the water is residing,
almost like she is parting the floods, I cry at the site of my
dear friends beautiful face, I am crying now.
I do not know where my Jesi went, but the snapping turtle was off
my arm and Jerri comes in with fresh cat food, litter and gets
those darn cats off my wrists.
and we hug, we hug so tight. It's a dream we didn't need masks.
The dream about ends there.... she was my salvation.

I have been trying to write this blog for sometime now because
I don't want to lie, I got home and was terrified of my cats.
They were fighting a lot, had taken over my bed Oliver had taken to using the bathroom wherever he 
saw fit even though either Rod or KD came check on them daily, fed them,
cleaned their litter. IF you leave animals alone for too long they do become
a little Pet Cemetery crazy. 
We are getting better the cats and I.
Bonnie, my cat given to me by the boo and his family after his
Mom passed away unexpectedly has become once again a source of
comfort to me. She leaves me be during the day and once I am in bed
she comes curl up with and purrs her sweet nothings.
If Oliver is not around we are okay.
Oliver is slowly realizing I am the boss here again.
My fear of them is getting better as I realize every day it was 
just a hallucinatory dream.
One thing is for sure and always will be,
Jerri and I willl forever be bonded as friends for life.
Thank you my dear friend, for all you didn't even
know you did! Can't wait to see you soon!
Love you!

Sunday, January 24, 2021

THOUGHTS COMING BACK....the cook's

As every day I begin to get better and better,
thoughts and memories that went on before going
to the hospital are coming back to me daily.
This one has a history to be explained so bare with the
long blog.
Although Ali and I went to school together we were not very
close. In the 80's we became very close
as her boyfriend and my husband then were best friends and
we were neighbors. Nothing like having a wonderful person as 
a neighbor to become a life long friend.
She became pregnant, miscarried and then was able to get pregnant
again right away. At the time, I was a young Mother of a two year
old and had one Godchild I adored. I have always taken the
job of God Parent seriously, a job not a title.
So when Ali asked me to be Godmother to her little baby boy
she was carrying, I am not going to lie, I almost told her no.
I just was afraid that because we were not blood related maybe
we would not stay close, I wanted her to know my reasons.
She had a big family, many friends but she wanted me to be
the Godparent to this baby. I prayed about it, a lot....A LOT!!!
..... and I said yes, with all the Will and desire to be in his life
forever. Things were not easy for Ali. She became a single Momma
and I have always said she was a hero of mine, all the things she missed,
holding down three and four jobs just to assure that her little son
would get what he needed. Which meant she missed a lot.
Rick missed nothing, she made sure of it.
I did my best, to bring him to basketball, buy him his shoes as
he was a very talented little basketball player. 
He, like all the bayou kids wanted to play all the sports afforded to
him and I financially helped get those extra things his Mom just
could not always get. He never wanted for anything necessary.
I kept him at the gyms as his Mom ran from gyms, to the next job, etc.
When he was sick at school and needed me I was there.
In any way I could, I tried to be the best Godmother I could be.
Ali told me often how much she appreciated all I did
but honestly I looked at it as being my role as his Godmother.
She never forgot...... NEVER FORGOT!
Our boy grew up, became more to me than I was to him, calling
me all the time, joined the Navy, married to his beautiful Sarah
making a wonderful career for himself and he still has time
to stay in touch with his Nannie.
OKay so now the story. 
Ali found and married the very best man for herself.
Once her little boy was all grown, she finally set her sights
on a life for herself and like all good love stories,
their meet up at a casino in Galliano where her Bryan was
there to build the new Leeville bridge, became love at first site
and it was not long before they married and all those
hard times for Ali, well she was finally able to settle down, relax
and enjoy spoiling the heck out of her lucky hubby. 
An injured chronic handicapped elbow kept her from continuing
to work but this girl, she spoils her Bryan crazy.
For the first time in her life she could be a stay home
"bridge builders wife" as she calls herself.
She still never stops but now it is following her love
wherever his job takes him, making sure when he comes home
he has all he wants and needs.
She spoils me too. I am now the divorced and Ali, never forgets
a birthday, a Christmas, anything. I tell her always I don't need
money, Ali, I don't need gifts Ali, yet she won't stop.
She is one of my biggest customers of my artist business.
Even after telling her numerous times that I no longer want her
to spend money on me, come Christmas here comes a package in
the mail from none other than Ali and Bryan Cook and their pups.
Oh I had seen these gifts before! My sister, C has given many 
and I always hoped to get one one day.
Okay, Ali you got me with this one I put this beautiful 
singing clock, with all its crystal beautiful pieces that move
around to several songs up right away in my
dining room. I would hear it play and loved it.
Then I got sick, the first 6 days of Covid pneumonia, I 
tried to stay home and care for myself. I knew I was not
well but so much was going around so many sick that
I just continued to do the best I could to keep my oxygen up
and my fever down.


There were moments I knew my fever was high and my thoughts and dreams
were not all quite right. I laid there in 103 fever deep breathing, sleeping on 
and off. Then I would hear my beautiful clock. Singing out a song for me
from my dear friend and it reminded me another hour had passed, another
song on my way to recovery.
I cannot really put into the words the reassurance that clock,
the sound of the song, knowing that my Ali was with me 
helped. It reminded me to check my fever, take some meds,
pray, pray. Every hour that clock went off I prayed. It 
was never a bother and not once did I think of shutting it off.
It became my lifeline. It will never be shut off as long as I have it.
Finally on the day I realized I needed to go to the emergency room,
I could no longer do this on my own.
I lay on my sofa awaiting Roddie to pick me up for the
emergency room. I could not get in enough oxygen to get
up from my sofa but the clock played on
 and the song that played on my clock
was the very same song I had been teaching Jillian on my piano
for some time. I was afraid and yet that clock kept me calm
focusing on deep breathing.
So, Ali, Bryan. You needed to know just what an important part
you all played in my recovery even when you had no clue.
Now as I get better daily the clock continues to play
reassuring messages to me and like I said, it will never be
turned down for as each hour it reminds me it is there,
I am also reminded to stop what I am doing and pray.
Pray for all the miracles around me and my loves.
To pray for Thanksgiving, to pray for our Country,
pray for those recovering illnesses, pray for
my cousin who is battling cancer, pray for so many
who has lost loved ones through this pandemic,
whatever comes to mind that hour.
Yes, and I pray for my dear, dear friend Ali and Bryan.
For even without them realizing it, I am better due to
in part of their wonderful gift.
 


Of course I cannot end the story there as a few days
after I was home there was a big knock on my front door
to see Sloane's florist van. 
Flowers to the cottage, daisies, my favorite, always
the ones Ali send me as well as the boo.
And of course, the card there is from my lifeline friends.
Again not necessary but so Ali.
I carry them with me whatever room I am in.

Thanks for everything my dear friends, 
but really....NO MORE  GIFTS, YOU GUYS ARE THE 
BEST GIFT I HAVE EVER RECIEVED!




Saturday, January 23, 2021

changes abound us

I want to start with one big statement! 
I, and no other person is in charge with the wisdom
and decisions I make, I have strong views and have
always spoken out on those believes.
If you can tolerate what you live you will not change.
This illness, Frank's illness has made me realize being
afraid of things happening around me I have been tolerated.
So as outspoken as I am, I had been hiding behind my fears of 
what is next for me. I have not doubt, never have, that there is
a higher power and there is so much more to life after this short world.
Yet, I struggled with the transition. The getting from this point to
the next point of life. Yet I know, I KNOW, GOD holds each of us
in the palm of our hands. I do not want to speak of the miracles
of others through all of this without permission but I 
want to share the words of my nine year old grand girl...
As her Daddy, who is her hero, who always seems to know
what they need and comes through for her and her sisters,
was so terrified of the illnesses that were surrounding some
of the peoople he loves so much, as he watched his wife
stand up and be so very strong, she, little Jilly cried
and with all her childhood wisdom said,
"All we have to do is pray"
and she and her sister, Jojo, they prayed,
Jojo made a special prayer and is insistent that prayer
has helped cure us and I believe...I believe.
Then when you get well and you realize the truth
in the statement 
"The Faith of a Mustard seed..." is all we need.
and it makes sense, and little girls tell you they have the answers
because they go this wonderful school that nurtures 
their learning and their faith.
I no longer am afraid of the hereafter.
It is not to say I am selfish and want as much time here with
my family as I can, but I fear nothing because I have God
on my side. When a physician tells you you have been witness
to a miracle, that if you do not kneel down and pray it is time
you should and I will. I have always prayed but I will never
again take for granted the gifts we have been given.
I would like to think I have always tried to be the best
I could and reached out to others but I also know now I have 
fallen short. I am not only peaceful right now but I am at Peace.
I will never ever forget again to thank God for figuring out
there is something I am not finished with yet.
To wake up daily, with the oxygen needed to sustain life,
to see the smiles of my grandgirls on FaceTime,
to know our frank will make his way back to our family.
Life is good and there is nothing, Nothing I shall want......


Thursday, January 21, 2021

SO MUCH TO SAY......

 I have so much to say, so much to write and because there is so much,
I find myself having trouble starting but I have to start somewhere before
all these wonderful (bragging again lol) thoughts get behind me.
Let me start out by saying....
I FAUGHT THE VIRUS AND AM WINNING!
I do not say this lightly or in any bragging fashion as what I had
was minimal compared to so many others, especially my
extended Guilbeau family, my daughter in laws daddy.
I am as of today, 57 years old and even with all I have
been though medically speaking, nothing, I mean nothing,
compares to the inability to breathe.
Very little is free today but oxygen is and when you know its there,
you know you won't be getting a bill for it but you just can't get it
in your body..... well it's scary. 
I had many ideas for me New Year of 2021,
I was making many personal changes but first was going
to be spending New Years Weekend in Miss. with two of my
4 sisters. We headed home on Jan 4th but I knew I was not well
days before we headed home. I was terrified, not for myself
but for my older sister, 16 years myjunior who almost died
of Covid months before. Thankfully she and my other sis, C did
not get Covid. When I returned home that Sunday evening I knew
I had a full raging Corona virus. 
Monday AM I drove myself to Ochsner Emergency room in Plaquemine.
there I not only tested for Covid but pneumonia with fevers climbing past 102.5.
MY oxygen level was hard to keep at 92 but I could go home as long as
I could keep my sats above 92 and monitor my temp.
I bunkered down in the cottage, thinking few days to rest and I would be okay.
Not the case. Each day I tried to tell myself I was better, until the Thursday
and I awakened not able to breathe and walk at the same time.
The Covid had also attacked the Guilbeau home and our Big Frank 
was very sick as well. Roddie picked me up rushed me back to Er 
and my o2 sats were 88! Never had I ever understood what a plastic piece
placed in your nose with clean, full oxygen being given to you was a God Send!
Of course I was afraid, but I knew I was not nearly as sick as many others.
A ct Scan showed double pneumonia and I decided on being admitted as
I knew I needed more help than I could get home.
I can write about 100 blogs on all I want to say, especially the
wonderful facility of Ochsners. Plaquemine Emergency room,
to O'niel Baton Rouge, everyone of any that has the Ochsner name
join the long list of my hero's. I had great nurses, my night nurse was great,
unfortunately I can't remember her name as some of the time
I have not many memories of the night.
I do want to speak of my day nurse, Oh my wonderful day nurse.
I don't want to break her anonymity but she does know I write a blog
and she was okay with speaking about our encounters.
I will call her Crys here.
I am a nurse, retired, mind you, but I am a nurse.
Before becoming sick I knew and thought of all those wonderful medical
professionals out there putting themselves and their families at risk
to help so many others trying to live and get back to their own homes and
loves. 
Never before had it impacted me to tears.
My Crys. she listened to me even when I could not speak.
She understood my fears without me saying them.
Once I could share a little more, she shared about her children,
including her baby two year old twins who had been babies
when this pandemic started. I think how brave, how brave she and her 
coworkers leave their own children and families home, putting herself
at risk just so she could try and get others back to their homes.
It is deep y'all. If you allow yourself to think about it, expecially as
you are fighting to breath, it will bring tears to your eyes.
Never did she complain never did she make even my simple requests
seem trivial. I knew she was busy but as I began to feel better, she took 
as much time as it took to explain all I needed to know.
One the second day, through tears I tried to explain to her just
how impactful she and her coworkers are to me. Our country fighting
against each other as they show up daily not worrying about anything
but getting us better. I explain that I am probably one of the least sickest 
and she made me feel like I was her only one she had to care for.
There are just no words to explain to a nurse how much she means to you.
I hope I did it a little bit. AS I left, I wanted to hug her.
I am a hugger, and this pandemic has taken this away from me but as
I was being wheeled to discharged, she told me she journaled and 
would love to follow my blog... we shared information and we gave air hugs.
I was choked up as I said to her,
"You have been one of the best parts of this whole experience."
I meant it, Ochsner, you are doing it right,
Crys, you and I will forever be friends.
You have not heard the last of us.
Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!
More to come!

Friday, January 1, 2021

Be

Each year I choose one word to be my "Mantra"..
This year that word is BE....
Just BE, because lots can be added to that one
powerful word.
It's a new Year, it's a new day....
I am not going to fill my head with 
New Years resolutions that will be over
probably by Jan 30th.
Instead I will keep my hopes to better myself
to myself and keep the mantra, Be
as my goal.
BE Kind
BE giving
BE honest
BE hardworking
Be an artist
Be an author......
I will say her though that I must Be honest with myself.
For my future, what I want for it.
Today I begin a writing a day in hopes that at the
end of this 2021, I will have something to show
the publishing company.
Make this year, 2021 the year you 
BE......

 

the inspirational JEMMA KATE

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