changes abound us

I want to start with one big statement! 

I, and no other person is in charge with the wisdom

and decisions I make, I have strong views and have

always spoken out on those believes.

If you can tolerate what you live you will not change.

This illness, Frank's illness has made me realize being

afraid of things happening around me I have been tolerated.

So as outspoken as I am, I had been hiding behind my fears of 

what is next for me. I have not doubt, never have, that there is

a higher power and there is so much more to life after this short world.

Yet, I struggled with the transition. The getting from this point to

the next point of life. Yet I know, I KNOW, GOD holds each of us

in the palm of our hands. I do not want to speak of the miracles

of others through all of this without permission but I 

want to share the words of my nine year old grand girl...

As her Daddy, who is her hero, who always seems to know

what they need and comes through for her and her sisters,

was so terrified of the illnesses that were surrounding some

of the peoople he loves so much, as he watched his wife

stand up and be so very strong, she, little Jilly cried

and with all her childhood wisdom said,

"All we have to do is pray"

and she and her sister, Jojo, they prayed,

Jojo made a special prayer and is insistent that prayer

has helped cure us and I believe...I believe.

Then when you get well and you realize the truth

in the statement 

"The Faith of a Mustard seed..." is all we need.

and it makes sense, and little girls tell you they have the answers

because they go this wonderful school that nurtures 

their learning and their faith.

I no longer am afraid of the hereafter.

It is not to say I am selfish and want as much time here with

my family as I can, but I fear nothing because I have God

on my side. When a physician tells you you have been witness

to a miracle, that if you do not kneel down and pray it is time

you should and I will. I have always prayed but I will never

again take for granted the gifts we have been given.

I would like to think I have always tried to be the best

I could and reached out to others but I also know now I have 

fallen short. I am not only peaceful right now but I am at Peace.

I will never ever forget again to thank God for figuring out

there is something I am not finished with yet.

To wake up daily, with the oxygen needed to sustain life,

to see the smiles of my grandgirls on FaceTime,

to know our frank will make his way back to our family.

Life is good and there is nothing, Nothing I shall want......