and it never seems to say enough, explain enough.
what our family has lost with saying goodbye to our Nonc Jay.
As was said in his eulogy,
"... whatever you called him, Calvin, CJ, Dad, Pop, Uncle Jay, Nonc Jay..."
My brother in law was so much to so many.
I was two when he and my sister, Veronica married.
So I have never known a life without our Jay.
When we were young and they would visit us,
Veronica would say, " we bringing my sisters home"
and he never said no. I never remember him ever complaining that
he had all these girls always around him.
He had his own three girls and bunches of little sister in laws.
When I lived with them for a part of my nursing school days,
there were many mornings when I was up early for clinicals.
He would always awaken before me, even when he didn't have to.
The coffee was brewing and he was making breakfast for us.
I would tell him he didn't have to do that but he
always answered, "Nah, I was cooking me some breakfast anyway"
yet I knew he was doing it for me.
Like I have told everyone, he was more of a Dad to us than a BIL.
When my children came to be, he was the best Nonc J.
He has made as many of their sports games as he could,
whether it was biddy basketball or football.
He loved him some football.
I can remember Roddie playing High school ball and
us all cringing when he started his favorite chants
which got him the cherished name,
"On side kick"
When he and my sister began having grandchildren
he was able to do all the sports, band events, trips with them.
Adored every minute with them.
Some of the times I will treasure forever were the times I slept there
after my children were grown and gone.
He and I would awaken early and have coffee together.
Talking about this one and that, catching up on life.
Just he and I and so much to talk about.
I think of my sister, his wife, married since they were 18 and
rarely spent more than a few nights apart.
Her life will be one of adjustment and will be fully
felt when the world goes back to "normal".
Us siblings, her children will be there to see her through it
but I know things will never be the same for her
never be normal for any of us.
Yet, if you knew our Jay, who was always the one to comfort
us girls, telling us "It's going to be okay"
you would know that is what he would tell us even now.
It's going to be okay.
When it's our turn to join him where he has gone before us,
he will have made a perfect place for us,
with a big screen TV and nonstop football games to cheer for.
He will not say Welcome home,
but more to the tune of
"One, two, three, kill the referee: Three, two, one kill the other one"
and with his deep hearty laugh will be the sound of
"ON SIDE KICK"
