My thoughts on school shootings...

 It has taken my days to be able to even think about posting a blog

about the recent school shooting that took place in Texas.

With that being said, I still don't think my writings will make much sense.

One reason being, the whole thing does not make sense.

I was a school nurse for 12 years. It was some of the best years of my life.

If you know me, you know I love me some children, to the point 

that the grandgirls say if I get a van, I will be "way too creepy".

I was in an elementary school starting with 4 year olds.

If you have never watched a 4 year old cry out of fear to go through a metal detector,

Watch their faces when we practice for a lock down, its hard to grasp.

Yet it was necessary when a second grader brought a pocket knife to school and threatened others.

People who work in any public school system probably know

that there have been children that from the early ages, we can spot out

those that are troubled, and some even use the statement,

"That one will grow up to shoot up a school"

In the privacy of a discussion over some children.

I know this won't be accepted as a popular statement to most 

but the reason for pointing them out was to start intervention early,

"Let's help this child" but hands are tied by many in the school systems.

Getting them into counseling can only be done if the adult who is in charge

of that child consents. "Nothing wrong with my kid" was also a common phrase.

I have screamed it from long ago, not enough is done for mental health.

What if mental health was the norm, counseling was the norm?

Would it change the family dynamics? Would it stop some of the violence?

We don't know but what can we loose by trying it?

Using the word bully in school by any adult is frowned upon.

Why? you may ask? For many reasons.

One being the amount of paperwork an educator must do to use that word

is out of this world. It would all be worth while if something was done for 

the bully and the children who are part of his circle.

Yet rarely does it happen. A teacher, a principle already has so much to do

in a public school system including teaching, that when nothing gets done,

they want to just go home after a long day and enjoy their own children.

I was witness to a fourth grade class that had a new student that had been

removed from another school due to his behavior. 

Keep in mind, the average age of a 4th grader is 9.

This child was 13, 13! 

He had raging hormones and an even higher raging attitude.

He sexually harassed 9 year olds, overturned desks, threatened the teacher, etc.

All the while 20 something other kids were watching or being victim.

The teacher wrote him up each time, had him removed from her class,

but the next day, there he was sitting in a desk.

You see it is very hard to have a child removed from a school.

His previous school, it took months to get him out of their

and because of "No child left behind" you have to attempt to give him an education.

He got all the attention, negative as it was.

My point here was not about this Bully, although he was a traumatized kid.

My point was the little eyes, 44 in total that watched this.

They saw him getting away with it, they were also bullied by him.

They will grow up and these things will have a cause and effect on them.

Will they be labeled at a young age, and be teased by their peers?

We don't know. We do know that most school shooting perpetrators have been bullied

and/or had a hard life with very little if any counseling.

Many are talking about a solution, yes we all want a solution,

but we live in a World that is so divided on so many levels and to 

have a solution be successful, I believe we all need to want and work hard for the solution.

When a school shooting becomes mundane, a daily event there is a lot 

wrong in our Country. This school shooting has been tragic and like

most of you, I have cried real salt water tears over it.

Yet on the very long list of school shooting, I can almost bet, you have not heard of some.

I disagree that not being able to buy a gun would solve this problem.

A friend of mind suggested give every teacher a gun and another child in their class

will not die on their watch.

This sounds really good at first, but then you have to take into account,

the fact that grown ups have also been known to go into an employer and kill.

One officer on campus with a gun cannot take care of 1200 children.

By the time he gets where he needs to be, many could be dead.

I am sorry for my morning rant, as I am normally not the negative Nelly

of course this is all my opinions only.

I do know this, 19 children families will never be the same.

Too many funerals in one little town are to be had.

Many other children are affected by what they witnessed in that school.

Some parents and families are at the bedside of one of their own that was shot.

Everyone of the people in that town, "their village" has been affected.

The lasting affect of this tragedy has changed the dynamic of this town.

That keeps me up at night sometimes.

The shooter, yes he has a family too, this boy was also someone's baby at one point.

Compassion may be hard to find for his family in the wake of the tragedy

he caused to so many, but when you put your babies to bed at night,

think about what if it was your child? 

and pray..... pray like you never have prayed before.

It is one of the many things we can do.

THE CARDINAL

I have painted many a Cardinals for others

but I had never had my own Cardinal experience myself.

It is believed that when these beautiful red birds appear,

it is a visitor from heaven, a loved one is near.

After having lunch with Hughbee and sisters and niece

I stopped to buy a bird feeder for my studio window.

I always had so many squirrels and birds there and I knew I would

enjoy watching them as I painted.

I cleaned my window and hung it up, filled it with birdseed...

and waited, and waited.....

Yep, I waited some more.

I was discouraged. Not a bird or squirrel in site.

Two weeks passed, not a one.

Then Hugh died.

I was upset, distraught, so sorry for my family 

especially my sister, brother in law, and Hugh's immediate parents and siblings.

I did what always gives me comfort, I went into the studio to paint.

Tried to put some sense into our loss.

First I heard it, a singing bird, then I saw it, the most beautiful red Cardinal

singing away on my fence!

One single bird, not another inside. I sat in awe.

Thinking well this has been an experience, while the whole time I thought of Hugh.

It did not end there, this Cardinal had a sense of humor

Just like our Hugh. He would fly away right when I cam to take a photo

or video, and when I got back into my painting he would repeat the cycle.

Sometimes even hitting on the glass with his beak.

It took a few encounters before he would sit on the birdfeeder

but eventually he did and would sing and eat.

Again each time I picked up my phone, to get footage,

he flew aways. This process lasted for days.

The day after Hughbee's funeral, I got him on camera.

A video to be exact.

I had to retell the story many times as I am a believer

of when things like this happen to you, it is meant to be shared.

Moving forward to last weekend, I had JoJo, Lillian and Violet 

over for a sleep over. As we sat in the studio making art I told them

the story about the Cardinal and showed them the video.

Then in true fashion, as we all got busy once again,

we heard the tap on the glass, the singing of my Cardinal.

Allowing these little girls to believe and know that when a Cardinal 

is seen, a visitor from Heaven, a loved one is near.

 

People say, I am the lucky one.

 People say, I'm the lucky one....

They also may say,

"Woman stop bragging about your kids"

However, it's my blog, and it's Mother's Day.... so here I go.

My kids, MY KIDDO'S!

I know the two I birthed are mine so, therefore,

I think they are the best things and also the best things I have ever done in my life.

In my eyes, they are the best of myself and their Daddy.

They are not perfect, but as I used to tell them when they were young,

"I am perfect because when I make a mistake, I say I was wrong"

(yeah it used to work when they were young)

I try not to bother them much with my personal issues 

and I try to be there for them however I can.

The table were turned two weeks ago when Hugh died.

I was distraught when finding out and called Roddie first.

He did not hesitate, drove here and put me in his arms and just held me.

He let me cry then sat with me until I told him he could go.

He visited with me the next morning as well and we talked about the big stuff.

To see him and Katie not only there for our family but supporting

me and our people, not hesitating to show their true feelings as well.

Yes, I also was blessed with the best two daughter in laws...

Then my Jesi, My gypsy baby....

Her pain the last few weeks has been palpable to her Momma.

Yet, I watched her....

I watched her drive herself right to Thibodaux to be with family that needed her

as much as she needed them.

She stayed, she showed up, she brought food.

I watched her and Sweet D at the funeral, bringing comfort to as many as they could,

all the while she, trying to deal with her own loss.

She was amazing, greeting people, making sure Ellen and Owen were fed,

hovered around them sat with them during one of the hardest times of their lives.

It didn't end there, I watched in admiration as she was not afraid to show 

her tears, knowing it was okay. Sweet D never left her side,

holding and distributing kleenex to all who needed. 

I watched and thought, she is like me in so many ways, 

and also so much her in even more ways..

Sometimes it takes a tragedy to see another side of your family.

Sometimes it takes a tragedy to remember just how blessed we all are.

Sometimes so many miracles happen while we try and figure this crazy world out.

On this Mothers Day, I wish you all a wonderful day.

If you still have your Momma, let this day be the one

you put past hurts aside, even if you can't have her in your life,

let her know you are who you are, good or bad, because of her influence.

You will miss her... no matter how you love or feel about her now.

To my own Mother, there on the "other side"

You, my dear, are the reason I love the way I do.

Happy Mothers Day to my Daddy too, 

because as a youngster, it was he, untraditionally at the time,

who raised us last ones while my Momma worked.

There are lots of Daddies out there who deserve their own Mothers Day.

Thanks to Roddie, Katie, Jesi and Del,

I get to say, I am a Mother.

Hugh John Plaisance

 Our family is extremely fortunate and blessed.

For many reasons, one being although we are an extremely big family

we have found a way to stay very close.

We also have not lost many young people in our immediate family.

People in our family grow old and die and while we know this is what 

is supposed to happen in our time here on Earth,

we also know we will miss them tremendously.

So loosing my 24 year old nephew, Hugh John is not natural to us.

I am sure its not natural to any family to loose one of their young,

but for us, I cannot remember a time when I sat in a church to bury a child from our village.

With that being said, what a heartbreaking yet most beautiful thing

to watch so many of our extended families, friends, 

and the Plaisance family

come out to give us all comfort in a time that has been so unreal to us all.

The teachers and friends of Hugh and his siblings who have been there

in support of their family has been no less than awe-inspiring.

  I can't say enough, that this boy and his

parents and siblings did everything, everything to be well.

He wanted this life to be good for him if not amazing.

He and his parents searched treatments, counselors, inpatient help,

He tried everything to lift the hand of depression from his life.

Yet, like his Uncle, Father Justin shared with us all in his homily,

Hugh was sick and our God would never be angry about the fact that

the illness of depression called him home to his Savior.

God tells us when weathering the storm becomes too much

God will carry us. Hugh could no longer weather the storm

so he went to his God who he knew could carry him through.

There are no words I can say to ease the pain of Rebecca, Mikie"s and their children.

There is no amount of comfort I can give to my sister and to Miki's family.

I only know that if my pain and feeling of loss is this great for Hughbee

I can't imagine what theirs is.

Our families love deep, very deep....

So when we loose one of our tribe, our people, it hurts,

to the point that I personally think in this time of crisis,

I won't love that deep anymore, it hurts too much.

Yet, its not what this Aunt Lil does, what this Mumsie does.

Today 6 days later, I know my purpose and place in this family

what is expected of an Aunt Lil who loves the way I do.

I put my big girl panties on and I try to be there for as many of them as I can.

whether it be a card, a text, a phone call.

Now more than ever I want all my "youngen's" to know,

I will help you weather any storm. just call. 

RIP my dear Hughbee you will be so missed but 

we all feel comfort knowing your pain, this illness is gone now.

Life will never be the same again but because of you, we will

"Love deeper, speak sweeter and give forgiveness we have been denying...

We will live like we are dying"

Just as you did.

(Thanks everyone, EVERYONE who came to our and the Plaisance

family aid during this time, I hope you know how this has carried us all through this)

Terrebonne/ Ledet home

This sweet couple here?

Introducing Sybil and Lloyd Ledet.

A power couple of our  home town whom I have known my entire life.

Sybil's Mom and my Mom were besties when they were children

and this friendship lasted all the way into their 90's when they both passed away.

This couple were entrepreneurs, never afraid to take on a new project,

a new job. But just like our Southern culture,

when her Mom became sick, they packed up everything and moved 

back home to Golden Meadow, in her childhood home to care for her Momma.

Hence, the home you see here in this portrait.

I went to school with their two children and because our Mom's

were best friends, we have always been involved with them.

When Lavelle, their daughter asked me to paint their home

many memories of growing up near the Ledet's came resurfacing.

This sweet little home was an honor for me to paint.

The fence lays on the right side of the home

but when asked to take this project on,

LaVelle reminded me of just how important the fence was.

Mr. Lloyd, making this property his own,

painted the fence with flowers and vibrant colors.

But it's more than just a fence.

Each time the fence needs to be repainted its a gathering of their family.

A day to relax, eat, share family stories, and paint.

The fence is beautiful but it is a symbol of family coming together

for one purpose, to love and enjoy each other.

When Ida came and so much of our Golden Meadow was torn up,

this fence withstood the test of a Category 4 storm.

I knew the fence, being put where it belongs would do it no justice.

It stood not only in the ground but also for so 

much more of what our South Lafourche area was about.

the coming together of our people to rebuild community.

My artistic heart decided this fence needed to be front and center.

Thankfully LaVelle let me go with whatever I thought was best

and this is the final piece, with Sybil and Lloyd seeing it.

Years ago, Mrs. Sybil gave me costume jewelry that belonged to her Momma.

I treasured it as it was also a piece of my Momma.

I didn't think I would be able to regift it to her on their home portrait.

All my paintings are special to me,

yet, some stand out in my heart because of the emotions it brings out in myself.

Thanks to this family for allowing me to do such a special piece,

because of our Mothers teaching us what a good bestie meant,

even before the word was a thing,

I remain friends with this wonderful couple forever.

Miracles are everywhere.

 Some doubt that there is truth in the concept of miracles,

some even doubt if miracles ever happened back in the "day".

Others believe that small miracles are just coincidences....

Then my nieghbor/friend posted this:

...JESUS HEALED A PARALYZED MAN BECAUSE 

OF HIS FRIENDS FAITH.

THIS IS WHY YOUR CIRCLE MATTERS.

...and I though wow, this family should know...

as they are part of a true life miracle that cannot be denied.

This brings me to the story of Rhonda and Brett Harrel.

Approximately 7 months ago, on one of those early mornings 

that I could not sleep, I noticed red flashing lights at 2 am

and went outside to see what was going on.

"Did you call 911?" the responder asked.

Not me and he gave me the house number of the Harrel's 

and I directed them there. I right away texted them to see if they

needed anything. 

"Brett fell and can't seem to get up" 

Brett had been having back pains and just thought is was that, back pains.

Later in the day, I checked on them and the news just kept getting worst.

He was diagnosed with a shattered vertebra and would need surgery that day.

He seemed to be paralyzed and only after the surgery would they know his fate.

Then the fracture was found to be caused by a cancerous tumor on his spine.

Then became the ICU, surgeons, oncologist, things were just not 

looking very good at that time. 

... and our little town, their friends and family?

Well we all began praying and thinking about them, 

all wanting to know the latest updates but not wanting to bother

them in their private moments.

Surgery seemed to be a success yet the paralysis continued.

He was moved to rehab to begin the long healing process and

waiting to see his prognosis from biopsies, when 

he had a heart attack and was back in ICU within days.

Their circle? Continued to pray, made Go Fund ME accounts,

sold t-shirts, anything to help this family out, anything in our reach.

Meals were sent, bought and served.

After many weeks in the hospital including hard work on his part

and loving dedication from his wife, he was scheduled to come home.

Within days we all gathered in their yard to get it ready for his arrival.

A ramp was made, paint was added to their door, 

gardening was done, lunch was cooked, a day in beautiful weather

all for the love of our neigbbor and friend.

Brett came home, began Chemo, continued rehab and Rhonda?

Well she kept doing everything she had to do to give him the best outcome.

Last week was the first time I actually was able to speak to Brett at his home.

I shared that he is a true miracle to us all, a true testament to all of us, he agreed.

Then Rhonda posted the above statement and I realized just how true it was.

The latest news on Brett is that he can now walk with a cane 40% of the time

and wheelchair the rest. The oncologist has stopped his chemo and there

seems no need at this time for a bone marrow transplant.

I am a nurse, his prognosis should not have had this outcome,

except for the prayers, thoughts, happenings of those who call themselves

"Their circle"

This family is a big part of our community, always doing something

to make Plaquemine a better place so our little town would not

be the same without the Harrel's.

When I asked permission to post a blog on their own miracle the answer was,

"Of course."

You see, we believe that if these events are not shared with others,

we are not doing our job to being disciples and sharing these miracles.

thank you Brett and Rhonda for allowing me to tell your story.

Miracles are everywhere, you just have to be open and look at them that way.

Her life...

A few weeks ago one of the grandgirls was learning about 

the difference between fact and opinion.

I would give her many situations and she would let me

know what she thought it was, fact or opinion.

Which brings me to the post.

I have thought long and hard about this blog entry,

Knowing I may get back lash for my opinion here

wondering how many people will agree this is fact.

My reason for hesitating brings me back to the height

of Covid days,  and "Black lives Matter" era.

When people would try and convince me that their 

opinion was fact, my only answer was 

"All lives matter"

and I was condemned for that. 

I could not understand how they were preaching Black lives Matter

when they were pro-choice and killing a baby was okay

through abortion. I know abortion has taken many babies,

black, white, Red, brown....

all colors but were they saying only the black lives mattered?

Many tried to make me believe this was a fact.

Yet I continued my belief that all lives matter,

my opinion, of course... it takes many to make the world go round.

Then the whole Black Lives Matter died down

because, I believe many who went into it with a strong support

found the organization that was founded through this belief

was found to be corrupt and helped very few black people.

Now I am known for wearing rose colored glasses...

I just can't at my time in life worry too much about things of this 

nature as it makes me unsettled and my mind and heart just

can't let it go.

I rarely watch the news, i just have a better day if I don't know 

what is going on out there.

Then this happened...

This beautiful soul who loved her life, loved NOLA

loved Mardi Gras who had worked her whole adult life

well past the time most adults work and was looking forward to retirement.

She was looking forward to spending time with her husband and family.

Was doing nothing wrong, when she was killed so that 

four teenagers could enjoy a joy ride in her car...

and this sparked something in me that has laid dormant for a while now.

The whole black lives matter thing would not leave me...

It does not matter what culture the children were, it matters that....

HER LIFE MATTERED...

And that the whole belief that until we agree that black lives matter,

no lives will matter. I beg to disagree..

Let turn that sentence around, 

Until all lives matter, black lives won't matter.

I tried to let this one sit with me staying silent,

but Her life mattered, the children who committed the crime?

Their lives mattered and now they and their families lives have also been ruined.

All for a short ride in this woman's car.

If I know this woman at all, from what I have read about her,

she would not be praying for herself, but for the souls of the teens.

One final and important thought.

I am told that the parents of these teens are the ones who turned in their children.

The one bright spot in the story, as if you have ever kissed your children

good night, You know how hard this was.

When Brian Laundry's parents have covered for their son.

these parents did the right thing.

They understand that her life mattered.