Thanksgivings and days of past

As I type this my oldest sister, 24 years my senior,

Lies in an ICU where after a few very scary days, is

Finally stable. Still very sick but we are so thankful 

She is still with us. It’s so common to say,

“I am thankful for her life” yet I am. As she tells me today

“Remember Lil how we always used to sit on the 

Cabinet at the big house”

And  I realize she is talking about our family home.

I had forgotten how just like her generation,

We all sat on the red and white kitchen cabinets too.

My mind and heart is flooded with those old memories

again. When Mom and Dad were both alive and it was

not questioned where we would spend our Thanksgivings.
It was always at the big house with all the family in tow. 

Then after Dad passed, I with my young family,

It was Thanksgiving at Veronica’s  And the next generation

Stayed longer to play board games and many of them

Followed me home after for a few nights of sleep overs. 

“I was there, Lilly, I was in the big house and we were all

There and I felt like I was falling off the counter

But mostly I was falling from all of y’all”

And I realize We are at yet another realm of our lives  

My children are grown with their own lives,

Minta, who used to be my sidekick, stands on the side
Of her mothers bed. Life, ever changing.
I awaken this morning to coffee already made and
A turkey prepared and put in the roaster by
The boo before he leaves for call week at 3 am.
I am thankful for this new normal.
A new Thanksgiving, a good one and different all the same.
I realize as I stood at my
Sisters bedside this morning that another era
Is approaching us. The first the Boo has without his own Mom,
The era where I know years will cause me to say goodbye to so
Many I love. Today it makes sense
When my Mom used to say
“Growing old is not all it’s cracked up to be while so many around you
Die”
And so what do I tell my dear oldest sister as she explains
“I knew if I fell off that counter I was gone from y’all”
I say
“ you know, it’s said Heaven can be whatever we want it to be
And for you, maybe your Heaven will
Be all of us together again in that big house on Dursette street
With all those we love, all the generations”
She contemplates this and finally shakes her head yes.
And I tell her with tears
“But not yet Taunt Mone”
She again shakes her head yes.
Today I am thankful for it all and for her
And for all the changes in my
55 years of living and for this Thanksgiving, and all those past
And all to come.
But mostly I’m thankful for all this World still has to offer me
And that when my time comes,
“I get to make my own Heaven and what a heaven it will be!”
( typed this on my phone so forgive any typo"s!)